Months of planning went into my Christmas shopping. Planned in minute detail to the very last curl in the ribbon and dusting of glitter on the wrapping paper and today it was acted out with military precision as I hit the High St of Walsall with presents in mind.  Now some rumour mongers will have you believe a list was provided for me including links to the items and provided in descending order down the High St to provide a hassle free experience but listen not to these naysayers, who would also have you believe that Santa doesn’t exist.

My day was mostly spent shopping in one form or another from food shopping to see out the apocalypse, then to Caldmore for the Hargun platters and the monthly curry requirements then off on the prezzie mission. I had considered going direct to Machine Mart and pretending that Linda really needed a biscuit jointer but that fleeting moment on insanity soon passed and I stayed faithful to the prescribed list, although I did meander into Crime Converters just in case there actually were any biscuit jointers available.

I expected the town centre to be far busier than it was, after all there must be thousands of people who left all their shopping until the Mayan prophecy had been proven false, for now. As it was most of the shops were bustling but not overly crowded. I used my best, confused look and the assistants were happy to oblige the list mysteriously left on my Google Drive. In what seemed like three hours it was all done and dusted for another year. As the completion of the shopping marks the start of Christmas, I warmed some mulled wine and cooked some bhaji’s and settled down for the evening of watching Slade on the telly.


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